To the First-Time Mama: Find the Joy!

I am still awake over here, walking and bouncing a restless baby.  I cannot understand how she takes a mere three cat-naps during the day and still has trouble falling asleep at night.  It is amazing this adorable three-month-old can so easily disrupt our entire household or, at the very least, my daily schedule.  Before this third, precious baby of ours joined the world, I ignorantly considered myself a professional mama; others have even called me "Supermom."  Let me tell you: this cape is tattered, my x-ray vision is obstructed by spit-up and other bodily fluids, and my secret power is styling my three-day-dirty hair.

I often remember the early days of motherhood five years ago and the abundance of naps I was granted.  Now, two big sisters demand my attention and crave my affection, all the while their baby sister is draining my energy, patience, self-confidence...and (sometimes) my joy.

Before baby arrived, I worried our two-year-old would feel neglected and replaced, but she is so carefree that I do not even think she is bothered by our newest resident.  I misjudged, however, the effects of baby on our oldest.  Even at five years old, she wants me to snuggle on the couch, play hairdresser, read books, and go shopping.  While I want to just curl up in bed for ten uninterrupted hours, she still wants to live and share special experiences with her mama.

I pray that her little mind is storing happy memories of these early months with her new, littlest sister, instead of the days that Mama cries, does not play with her much...and even yells.

This journey is harder than I anticipated, but it is a one-way street; I will not have second chances or do-overs of the same day.  I must fall into our Lord's gracious arms and allow Him to rejuvenate my spirit.  I must collapse into bed at night leaving my disappointments of today and my expectations of tomorrow in the diaper-filled trashcan.  My girls may not remember all the details of their childhood, but they will remember if I was happy...or not.

Take heart, First-Time Mama, even those of us with a zoo of kiddos still struggle to keep our heads above water.  While we try our best to keep our children nicely dressed, organically fed, and intellectually stimulated, some days, they wear pajamas from morning until bedtime, eat mac & cheese for lunch and dinner, and engage in better conversations with Daniel Tiger than they did with each other.  If we stress over every minuscule detail of every day, we will be searching for our sanity during the five-second-long trips to the bathroom.  (You know, the ones interrupted by tiny, spider-like toddler fingers under the door.)

Motherhood is hard, but "mama" is the most rewarding of titles we will ever have.  Allow yourself to enjoy the younger, sleep-deprived years, before the teenage attitudes and after-school activities test your sanity again.  (I have heard those years with three daughters will be F-U-N.)  Tackle the challenges of the day, knowing that our Father has well-equipped you with the skills and heart needed to raise your little one.  Your journey is a one-way street.  Be sure to find the joy!

"Her children arise and call her blessed..."
Proverbs 31:28 (NIV)